The question "Am I looking for what's right or am I looking for what's wrong?" has the power to shift a moment of despair into a moment of delight. When we look for what's right, we conciously refocus the lens of our perceptions. Suddenly we are able to see the good in every situation and every person.
- Debbie Ford, The Right Questions: Ten Essential Questions to Guide Your LIfe
Friday, January 16, 2009
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
I woke up this morning feeling like I could breathe again. Today begins a new era in our country. As I write these words I can hear the slightly cynical voice inside of me ask who I think I am kidding. Barack Obama's campaign was built on hope - and today, it is on hope that I now rely.
Rarely have I been so inspired by a leader. Unlike anyone I have ever seen President-elect Obama's words and presence touch me deeply by both inspiring me to look at the world in a different way and, more importantly, challenging me to take action. The test of a good leader is not his or her ability to excite a crowd, while inspiring passion is part of it, the real test is whether or not they can mobilize people to take action, to get up and follow. It is to this that I find myself responding.
I am one of the small businesses about which the campaign's spoke this year. I am a business man who feels the impact of the difficult economic times and yet will also be asked possibly to give a little more to help those who can not help them selves. To this I say, yes I can. Not only can I, I want to. It is time for us to move beyond the self-centered, me first attitude that so often prevails in our culture today. It is time to realize that we are all traveling down the road. And, as the people before us have reached out a hand to help us along, so must we do the same for them.
And, so, today I celebrate a new day !!
Rarely have I been so inspired by a leader. Unlike anyone I have ever seen President-elect Obama's words and presence touch me deeply by both inspiring me to look at the world in a different way and, more importantly, challenging me to take action. The test of a good leader is not his or her ability to excite a crowd, while inspiring passion is part of it, the real test is whether or not they can mobilize people to take action, to get up and follow. It is to this that I find myself responding.
I am one of the small businesses about which the campaign's spoke this year. I am a business man who feels the impact of the difficult economic times and yet will also be asked possibly to give a little more to help those who can not help them selves. To this I say, yes I can. Not only can I, I want to. It is time for us to move beyond the self-centered, me first attitude that so often prevails in our culture today. It is time to realize that we are all traveling down the road. And, as the people before us have reached out a hand to help us along, so must we do the same for them.
And, so, today I celebrate a new day !!
Friday, October 31, 2008
I used to be afraid to spend time alone. I always hadthe television or radio on so I wouldn't have to be alone with my thoughts. I've now come to cherish the time I have with me. I love the solitude and quiet.
I came across the following poem today:
Do not be afraid to embrace the arms
of loneliness.
Do not be concerned with the thorns
of solitude.
Why worry that you will miss something?
Learn to be at home with yourself
without a hand to hold.
Lean to endure isolation
with only the stars for friends.
Happiness
comes from understanding unity.
Love
arrives on the footprints of your fear.
Beauty
arises from the ashes of despair.
Solitude
brings the clarity of still waters.
Wisdom
completes the circle of your dreams.
- Nancy Wood
I came across the following poem today:
Do not be afraid to embrace the arms
of loneliness.
Do not be concerned with the thorns
of solitude.
Why worry that you will miss something?
Learn to be at home with yourself
without a hand to hold.
Lean to endure isolation
with only the stars for friends.
Happiness
comes from understanding unity.
Love
arrives on the footprints of your fear.
Beauty
arises from the ashes of despair.
Solitude
brings the clarity of still waters.
Wisdom
completes the circle of your dreams.
- Nancy Wood
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Be Open to Outcome, Not Attached to Outcome
Angeles Arrien, PH.D. is an anthropologist, author, educator and corporate consultant who has studied indigenous populations around the world. Her work reveals four archetypal patterns that lead to greater peace and balance in life. Each has a motto by which to live.
The principle that guides the Teacher, one of the four, is "Be open to outcome, not attached to outcome" According to Arrien the Teacher has wisdom and teaches trust, and understands the need for detachment.
In these challenging economic and political times, the way of the teacher is an important lesson for me. Day in and day out I see people; clients, friends, colleagues, and me struggling to remain calm and find some sense of balance as the world changes around us. It can be, a scary time.
I find peace when I step back and contemplate the way of the Teacher. Leaning on wisdom, trust and detachment during these times reminds me that there is a bigger picture that I can't see. I am reminded to have faith. And, along with faith, to do my part to contribute and be part of the solution, rather than part of the problem. I step back and ask myself, or even better my higher power, for guidance as to the next right step that I can take. I may not be able to see the whole solution but if I do the next right thing and stay open to what the outcome may be, I am able to maintain peace and continue to move forward in life in a way that is of service to myself and the people around me.
Angeles Arrien, PH.D. is an anthropologist, author, educator and corporate consultant who has studied indigenous populations around the world. Her work reveals four archetypal patterns that lead to greater peace and balance in life. Each has a motto by which to live.
The principle that guides the Teacher, one of the four, is "Be open to outcome, not attached to outcome" According to Arrien the Teacher has wisdom and teaches trust, and understands the need for detachment.
In these challenging economic and political times, the way of the teacher is an important lesson for me. Day in and day out I see people; clients, friends, colleagues, and me struggling to remain calm and find some sense of balance as the world changes around us. It can be, a scary time.
I find peace when I step back and contemplate the way of the Teacher. Leaning on wisdom, trust and detachment during these times reminds me that there is a bigger picture that I can't see. I am reminded to have faith. And, along with faith, to do my part to contribute and be part of the solution, rather than part of the problem. I step back and ask myself, or even better my higher power, for guidance as to the next right step that I can take. I may not be able to see the whole solution but if I do the next right thing and stay open to what the outcome may be, I am able to maintain peace and continue to move forward in life in a way that is of service to myself and the people around me.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
With the economy such as it is, business has slowed down. I have a little more time on my hands to write.
I have spent a lot of time recently thinking about mid-life transition and what it means. Authors such as Robert Johnson and Kathleen Brehony have written extensively about it. I highly recommend Brehony's book, Awakening at Midlife. I am thinking about it more because I am there. I recently turned 41. I find myself asking myself a lot of questions about what is important in life. Its an exciting time. And, at times scary. This period of ones life often means change, change can be scary.
I came across the following passage by the poet Robert Bly. I like it because it describes what happens to us as children and why a midlife transition is necessary.
When we were one or two years old we had what we might call a 360-degree personality. Energy radiated out from all parts of our body and all parts of our psyche. A child running is a living globe of energy, all right; but one day we noticed that our parents didn't like certain parts of that ball. They said things like: "Can't you be still? Or "It isn't nice to try and kill your brother." Behind us we have an invisible bag, and the part of us our parents don't like, we, to keep our parents love, put in the bag. By the time we go to school our bag is quite large. Then our teachers have their say; "Good children don't get angry over little things." So we take our anger and put it in the bag. By the time my brother and I were twelve in Madison, Minnesota, we were known as "the nice Bly boys." Our bags we already a mile long.
I have spent a lot of time recently thinking about mid-life transition and what it means. Authors such as Robert Johnson and Kathleen Brehony have written extensively about it. I highly recommend Brehony's book, Awakening at Midlife. I am thinking about it more because I am there. I recently turned 41. I find myself asking myself a lot of questions about what is important in life. Its an exciting time. And, at times scary. This period of ones life often means change, change can be scary.
I came across the following passage by the poet Robert Bly. I like it because it describes what happens to us as children and why a midlife transition is necessary.
When we were one or two years old we had what we might call a 360-degree personality. Energy radiated out from all parts of our body and all parts of our psyche. A child running is a living globe of energy, all right; but one day we noticed that our parents didn't like certain parts of that ball. They said things like: "Can't you be still? Or "It isn't nice to try and kill your brother." Behind us we have an invisible bag, and the part of us our parents don't like, we, to keep our parents love, put in the bag. By the time we go to school our bag is quite large. Then our teachers have their say; "Good children don't get angry over little things." So we take our anger and put it in the bag. By the time my brother and I were twelve in Madison, Minnesota, we were known as "the nice Bly boys." Our bags we already a mile long.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Monday, October 27, 2008
It's been a while since I've written anything. I go through periods of time when I am too caught up in the daily work to sit and reflect. This is one of the great challenges of leadership and life in general today. We spend so much time running from task to task, project to project that we rarely take time to reflect on where we are going - we end up running in circles.
I started with a new client last week. She is a single mother of two young children as well as a busy executive. She works hard to hold both her personal and professional life together. When I asked her about time for herself she laughed....she said if she didn't laugh, she would cry. At the end of our first session I challenged her to find something small that she could do for herself between our sessions. Through our conversation she realized that in the busyness of her life she had aborted her spiritual practice. She committed to finding time for it in the coming week. When I checked in with her on Friday she reported that she had indeed turned off the TV 30 minutes early each night - after the kids went to bed - and sat quietly reflecting on the day and on what was important to her. The result of doing so was a better nights sleep which resulted in more energy during the day and feeling better about herself.
Sometimes we have to go back to the basics. When life gets busy we want to create elaborate plans for fixing what we think is broken when in fact, if we just step back and find the simple things which are relatively easy to do, the bigger things take care of themselves.
I started with a new client last week. She is a single mother of two young children as well as a busy executive. She works hard to hold both her personal and professional life together. When I asked her about time for herself she laughed....she said if she didn't laugh, she would cry. At the end of our first session I challenged her to find something small that she could do for herself between our sessions. Through our conversation she realized that in the busyness of her life she had aborted her spiritual practice. She committed to finding time for it in the coming week. When I checked in with her on Friday she reported that she had indeed turned off the TV 30 minutes early each night - after the kids went to bed - and sat quietly reflecting on the day and on what was important to her. The result of doing so was a better nights sleep which resulted in more energy during the day and feeling better about herself.
Sometimes we have to go back to the basics. When life gets busy we want to create elaborate plans for fixing what we think is broken when in fact, if we just step back and find the simple things which are relatively easy to do, the bigger things take care of themselves.
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